Straight Talk Advice

Apr 26, 2006

The big fat modern wedding

Dear Straight Talk: A few weeks ago you printed a piece on a guy getting married and his mom was freaking out that he was perhaps going to the altar when he really didn’t want to. This is so typical that I’d like to personally protest the whole idea of the modern wedding. If adults wonder why nobody’s getting married these days, this pressure around the “the big fat perfect wedding” is a big fat reason why.

It would be so much easier on the couple, so much more realistic on nerves and bank accounts, if they could say their vows in a small, private setting with no material fanfare—taking strictly a spiritual angle—without the families sniping and competing over who you’re spending the most time with, who’s on the guest list, who is wearing what, whose money’s being spent, etc. It’s enough to make you keel over. You’d have to be 42, with no life, to be able to handle it. Or else drink a whole lot, which, if you’ve noticed, is how most grooms get through their “special” day.

There are some cultures where the betrothed say to each other three times in front of the holy person: “I marry you, I marry you, I marry you.”  Now THAT I could handle.—19, in a committed relationship, but a wedding, are you kidding?

Dear 19: I hear what you’re saying. And if I had my way, the couple would receive at least ten big fat hours of marriage counseling before they take those sacred vows.

Anyone else like to comment on the modern wedding?


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