Is there a unique sign or feeling for true love?
Dear Straight Talk: I'm 18, a high school graduate and my boyfriend is 20. I want to commit to the man I love. My mother thinks it's a bad idea. She says don't rush, if it's real love it won't go away, it will grow. Is 18 too young to get married? I'm on the pill, I'm not pregnant, we both have jobs. Is there a sign or unique feeling that signifies true love? —“Helen” in West Virginia
Editor's Note: I have talked about the Pill's rotten little problem in our column from SEP 5, 2012, titled "Does college couple need pill and condom both?" Below is my adapted Editor's Note from that column.
Something fishy about the Pill: For women, the smell of a man is the main attractor in intimacy. And the men who smell best to a particular woman make the healthiest babies. Sweaty-T-shirt-sniffing experiments show that women naturally sniff out men who are good genetic matches. But on birth control pills, they actually sniff out the "wrong" men. What happens is that birth control pills simulate pregnancy which attracts women to the smell of men with similar genetic properties (more like family). Once she's off the Pill, she goes back to her natural attraction to men with genetic properties not only different than hers, but likely to create healthy offspring.
In other words, being on the Pill is not a good way to meet the guy you will be attracted to for the long haul. Marriage counselors say that the top complaint by women no longer interested in their husbands sexually is that they can no longer stand his smell. How many young women are on the Pill when they meet the guy they end up marrying and/or having children with? Millions. This could be a huge factor in why the divorce rate has skyrocketed since the 1960s when the Pill was introduced to the masses.
Another good reason to use a non-hormonal IUD instead of the Pill. The IUD is the most effective birth control available, it does not involve constant flooding of your system with synthetic hormones, you do not have to remember to take it, it is inexpensive, and best of all, you are more likely to end up with Mr. Right. Mr. Right not only keeps smelling attractive to you throughout life, but he and you will make healthier babies when the time is right.
The book, "Scent of Desire," by Rachel Herz, Ph.D., is full of this and other astounding information about our sense of smell. For more on what stinks about the Pill, sniff out your own research or check out this article in Scientific American. —Lauren
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